What have you learnt?

Convicted Driver Insurance

Alldaybreakfastin

Well-known member
I’m approaching my court date, and I am beyond terrified of managing life after ban and struggling pretty hard mental health wise - but I’m trying start thinking in a different way, as incredibly hard as it is.

I’m just wondering what others convicted of drunk driving have learned about themselves from this? What are you grateful for? How has it changed you as a person? Have you found any unexpected positives during the punishment that you didn’t expect?

Thank you 🙏
 

Jimbob

Well-known member
Positives, you get a lot fitter having to walk to shop rather than just nipping out in car.
Positive you don't need a drink to have a good time and can cut down and you feel a lot better, sleep better, skin is better.
Positive, not that I'm counting but 476 days without a drink so save loads of money!!!!
Negative I eat more chocolate since I stopped drinking!!! 🤣
 

Alldaybreakfastin

Well-known member
Wow well done, that’s incredible! 👏

Unfortunately I’ve a medical condition that means physical activity isn’t advised. However I will have to try and cycle 15 miles a day minimum anyway. Scared of starting this as meant to stay away from cardio! Hills included and poor public transport 😬

No such thing as too much chocolate!
Positives, you get a lot fitter having to walk to shop rather than just nipping out in car.
Positive you don't need a drink to have a good time and can cut down and you feel a lot better, sleep better, skin is better.
Positive, not that I'm counting but 476 days without a drink so save loads of money!!!!
Negative I eat more chocolate since I stopped drinking!!! 🤣
 

Jimbob

Well-known member
Wow well done, that’s incredible! 👏

Unfortunately I’ve a medical condition that means physical activity isn’t advised. However I will have to try and cycle 15 miles a day minimum anyway. Scared of starting this as meant to stay away from cardio! Hills included and poor public transport 😬

No such thing as too much chocolate!
You maybe need to think about one of them electric bikes, pretty sure you can have one of them even if convicted of DD
 

price1367

TTC Group
You maybe need to think about one of them electric bikes, pretty sure you can have one of them even if convicted of DD
You can!
So long as it conforms to the Electrical assisted pedal cycle regulations 1973 as amended, no driving licence required. Can help a great deal with 15 mile journeys.....

 
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Luna2000

Well-known member
I bought myself an Electric Bike and use it everyday. Get one you can put pannier bags on. I have 2 massive pannier bags. My wife get the bus to the local supermarket, I cycle there, pop the shopping in the bags and she either walks or get's the bus home. It' very bloody cold in the winter no matter what clothes you are wearing, but for 6 months of the year can feel quiet pleasant. You can even simply just use the throttle on it if you want. When/if I do get my licence back later this year, I think I'll still keep on using it.
 

Guygibson

Active member
Pluses for me was I took it as a sign to completely stop drinking and join AA which is amazing not just to keep you sober but make you a better person and you meet some amazing people 1yr and counting i would say get fitter but with the lockdown I have got fatter 😄
 

Luna2000

Well-known member
Pluses for me was I took it as a sign to completely stop drinking and join AA which is amazing not just to keep you sober but make you a better person and you meet some amazing people 1yr and counting i would say get fitter but with the lockdown I have got fatter 😄
Yes, I did that as well. It will be 2 years on July 23rd. I am not sure if it is something that should be mentioned to the Doctor during the DVLA exam, as there is a possibility it could be construed as dependency leading you to seek help. I was an abuser (a daily one for a while,) but could function normally once I had been off the booze for a few days. I don't know if I'm any healthier, but psychologically speaking, I am much better.
 

SarahNolan

New member
You sit and rethink your life, everything gets better, and then you think that you need to drink again )))))
 

Luna2000

Well-known member
You sit and rethink your life, everything gets better, and then you think that you need to drink again )))))
Luckily Sarah, I have not been tempted to drink again. I think AA helps with this. You can get involved at the level that suits you. Some people go all the way and enter the programme with a sponsor. Others like me, find that sticking to one or two meetings every week keeps them on the straight and narrow. Yes, stopping drinking completely can be difficult, especially at social occasions, but if someone asks you if you want a drink of alcohol, simply say no and order a soft drink. Don't elaborate. Don't try and explain. You owe no one an explanation regarding your choices. I would recommend AA if you haven't tried it. For some people it becomes their entire life. They make friends there and socialise almost exclusively with other AA members, probably because when they drank all their social activities revolved around alcohol, so breaking the old bonds is no bad thing.
 

January

Well-known member
Hello, a good point what did I learn,
Probably to realise I could not deal with this on my own & reached out to friends
Also that I am stronger than I think & you survive this, it gets easier like dealing with a bereavement but you don’t forget - my hours in a cell will never leave me.
On this forum it is regularly noted how it’s easier post court I agree but I got a lot of press coverage due to the post I held but aside from that it was easier
I also learnt that true people stand aside you & with no car in lockdown my neighbours offered to pick up shopping etc
Other neighbours- (it was the local free paper in 1/2 pg with photo ) some never said anything & one person crosses the road when she sees me (interestingly her mum who she lives with is very chatty )
Same with friends consider it a Christmas card review!

I learned that it's old news & other things come along to replace it in my case covid

Take home messages
A) count the small things to be grateful for the birds in the garden etc work on gratitude

B) don’t let it define you at the end of the day one mistake
C) now I am back driving I don’t drink at all as I wouldn’t want to be stopped even if under the limit & police smell alcohol etc ( I was caught morning after) that’s something for you to consider
One day at a time & take a friend to court & read forum guidance re court
Good luck
 

Alldaybreakfastin

Well-known member
Hello, a good point what did I learn,
Probably to realise I could not deal with this on my own & reached out to friends
Also that I am stronger than I think & you survive this, it gets easier like dealing with a bereavement but you don’t forget - my hours in a cell will never leave me.
On this forum it is regularly noted how it’s easier post court I agree but I got a lot of press coverage due to the post I held but aside from that it was easier
I also learnt that true people stand aside you & with no car in lockdown my neighbours offered to pick up shopping etc
Other neighbours- (it was the local free paper in 1/2 pg with photo ) some never said anything & one person crosses the road when she sees me (interestingly her mum who she lives with is very chatty )
Same with friends consider it a Christmas card review!

I learned that it's old news & other things come along to replace it in my case covid

Take home messages
A) count the small things to be grateful for the birds in the garden etc work on gratitude

B) don’t let it define you at the end of the day one mistake
C) now I am back driving I don’t drink at all as I wouldn’t want to be stopped even if under the limit & police smell alcohol etc ( I was caught morning after) that’s something for you to consider
One day at a time & take a friend to court & read forum guidance re court
Good luck
Hi, thanks for your reply. Court was yesterday, I got 12 months to 9 with the course. I’m really going through the motions with it as I’d just secured a good job (enhanced DBS sort of job) which is now really in jeapordy. I’m 25 and haven’t really got a career going yet due to health issues, I was exctatic when I got it but now I feel I’ve ruined any chances of a career with the record.

Luckily family and friends are being supportive but it doesn’t take away the feelings of guilt and failure. My offence was a genuine misjudgment of sobriety and my reading low, but the label remains and the difficult year on the horizon scares me.

Im not a big drinker at all, once every 6 weeks maybe, but in the future I certainly won’t be touching it anywhere near a vehicle ever again.

I’m glad things are good for you again, could I ask if you managed to keep your job through it all?
 

Louise 73

Active member
Hi, thanks for your reply. Court was yesterday, I got 12 months to 9 with the course. I’m really going through the motions with it as I’d just secured a good job (enhanced DBS sort of job) which is now really in jeapordy. I’m 25 and haven’t really got a career going yet due to health issues, I was exctatic when I got it but now I feel I’ve ruined any chances of a career with the record.

Luckily family and friends are being supportive but it doesn’t take away the feelings of guilt and failure. My offence was a genuine misjudgment of sobriety and my reading low, but the label remains and the difficult year on the horizon scares me.

Im not a big drinker at all, once every 6 weeks maybe, but in the future I certainly won’t be touching it anywhere near a vehicle ever again.

I’m glad things are good for you again, could I ask if you managed to keep your job through it all?
I spoke to unlock recently regarding my DBS and how it will effect returning to work. Things are really different to how they used to be (for the better) and the fact that you have secured the job they will really have to assess whether or not your conviction pose a risk to the post you are to fulfill. It could be classed as discrimination if not and depending the kind of company, they don't like it. Speak to unlock, they will reassure you
 

January

Well-known member
Hi, thanks for your reply. Court was yesterday, I got 12 months to 9 with the course. I’m really going through the motions with it as I’d just secured a good job (enhanced DBS sort of job) which is now really in jeapordy. I’m 25 and haven’t really got a career going yet due to health issues, I was exctatic when I got it but now I feel I’ve ruined any chances of a career with the record.

Luckily family and friends are being supportive but it doesn’t take away the feelings of guilt and failure. My offence was a genuine misjudgment of sobriety and my reading low, but the label remains and the difficult year on the horizon scares me.

Im not a big drinker at all, once every 6 weeks maybe, but in the future I certainly won’t be touching it anywhere near a vehicle ever again.

I’m glad things are good for you again, could I ask if you managed to keep your job through it all?
Glad court behind you. My job, well my organisation were very supportive & the top team behind me but I had a long service record with multiple promotions. I had to been investigated by my professional body this was hard as i knew work would have to take action but amazingly the body took no action

I have enhanced DBS nit needed one for a while but I will ensure if I have to have an update it will be clear to whoever
Interestingly I was approached re a charity trustee volunteer role & I decided not to take it further as a discussion as to my suitable with a DD conviction would have to be discussed
The one bit of advice I got I’d be honest but let people know how remorseful you are
Suggest contact employer the person who offered job not HR , explain send letter of remorse & any character references that you had for court to them - also offer any regular meetings etc to discuss or even extended probation just to show it was a one off
Honesty is best
Let us know how you get on
Good luck
 

Alldaybreakfastin

Well-known member
Glad court behind you. My job, well my organisation were very supportive & the top team behind me but I had a long service record with multiple promotions. I had to been investigated by my professional body this was hard as i knew work would have to take action but amazingly the body took no action

I have enhanced DBS nit needed one for a while but I will ensure if I have to have an update it will be clear to whoever
Interestingly I was approached re a charity trustee volunteer role & I decided not to take it further as a discussion as to my suitable with a DD conviction would have to be discussed
The one bit of advice I got I’d be honest but let people know how remorseful you are
Suggest contact employer the person who offered job not HR , explain send letter of remorse & any character references that you had for court to them - also offer any regular meetings etc to discuss or even extended probation just to show it was a one off
Honesty is best
Let us know how you get on
Good luck
Thank you. I was literally just at the point of sending my documents off when the DD happened. I was planning on asking to defer the job for health reasons, but will definitely have to now as car essential for the role.

I told a suitability advisor of the charge straight away and they said it wouldn’t be a definite no but I’d have to go through a suitability hearing to assess risk and see what I’d learnt about myself from it. My record and license are otherwise clean and always have been, so I’m hoping I can show this really was just one stupid moment of poor judgement.

I don’t know whether the hearing is just procedure, but I’m not technically employed yet so I thought if it were to be a definite no they’d have just said it’s unlikely you’ll be accepted now.

Hindsight!!!
 

AndyJG

Well-known member
I’m approaching my court date, and I am beyond terrified of managing life after ban and struggling pretty hard mental health wise - but I’m trying start thinking in a different way, as incredibly hard as it is.

I’m just wondering what others convicted of drunk driving have learned about themselves from this? What are you grateful for? How has it changed you as a person? Have you found any unexpected positives during the punishment that you didn’t expect?

Thank you 🙏
I have learned, that drink driving, is the only crime you can commit, where you can do the "time" and pay the fine, complete any courses at your own expense.....and still serve extra time...
 

Luna2000

Well-known member
I have learned, that drink driving, is the only crime you can commit, where you can do the "time" and pay the fine, complete any courses at your own expense.....and still serve extra time...
To be honest AndyJG, it just feels that way because it is you that committed it. Yes, it is the 'gift that keeps on giving,' in the form of increased insurance premiums, difficulty in getting driving jobs (although I do know of one person with 3 convictions who now has a Privat Hire Taxi license,) travel restrictions to certain countries (Canada being one that effectively bars you for 10 years from the date of the conviction.) But I used to work for the Prison Service and believe me there are worse crimes that you will never escape from.

I also know of know of a senior director in a construction company that built some of our prisons and who had been sober for over 10 years who began drinking again due to marital problems and ended up with a 4 month sentence in one of the jails he had been involved in building. Tad embarrassing that.
 

Stooky

Active member
You learn to adapt.
I'm a self employed carpenter. Carrying tools around is a nightmare. The company I was sub contracted to were brilliant at the time, putting me on jobs near a train route, jobs that were close or that I could get lifts. But they obviously became tired of trying to sort me out, so work dried up from them.
The timing was pretty good, at the start of the 1st lock down, so no 9ne was working anyway.
Since then I've changed the type of work that I would normally take on. I'm now working in people's gardens im my local neighbourhood.doing decking and fencing etc.. its not the type of work I like doing, I prefer to be indoors. But it pays the bills.
My ban was up in March, just waiting for a medical. So hopefully I can get back to doing the type of work that I want
 
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